The girls and I just returned from a wonderful two-day trip to Nashville, Indiana. We travelled with those we have come to affectionately call "The Bane Ladies."
My mom's family is very close-knit. My grandmother, with her unquestioning faith in the Lord and unconditional love for her 14 children, created an amazing circle of admiration -- a legacy of love. Growing up, this large famly was the center of my world. I was blessed to be raised alongside numerous aunts, uncles, and cousins who doubled as additional sets of parents and siblings, and as a child I thought we would all remain close throughout our adult lives. As tends to be the case, however, life-changes had a way of making alternative plans for us, and as the cousins married and began raising families of their own, our limited time together caused us to drift apart.
Thankfully, some years back, my mother's younger sisters decided to organize a retreat for the ladies of the family. They invited all females connected to the Bane family by blood or marriage to join them for a slumber party, and chose a wonderful bed and breakfast inn in Nashville, Indiana, as the meeting spot. Those of us who were longing for reconnection jumped at the chance! That first trip was nothing less than amazing - we shopped, talked, laughed, played games, acted silly, and swooned over delicious desserts. We enjoyed it so much we decided to go back again...and again...and AGAIN!
Our circle of "Bane Ladies" has changed since that first year. I'll never forget the last year Aunt Nancy went with us. She had lost her hair and her stamina, but not her spirit. We intentionally slowed our pace of walking from shop to shop, and we landed back at the inn early when it was apparent she was tiring. Munching on desserts, we listened to her giggle as we placed bets on what color her hair would be when it grew back.
Sadly, the next fall found our group a little smaller. The thought of going without her was difficult, and the stay was certainly bittersweet as we reminisced about our time on earth with her, and shared how hard it was without her. It was a time of healing for us all. The circle was smaller, yes, but it was tighter...and the hugs lingered a little longer in an effort to hold on to that fleeting moment of breathlessness.
The circle was extended this year as my three daughters joined us in Nashville for the first time. As a grown woman, I realize how richly I have been blessed with the wise counsel of these amazing ladies and the legacy of love that was built to support me - the legacy they recieved from their mother. It was incredibly touching to watch my daughters join the circle and to see the legacy begin its descent to the next generation.
I don't think it a coincidence that I found a small trinket at a shop in Nashville that spoke directly to my heart that first year without Aunt Nancy. It says "Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away." It still speaks expressly to me today. That the Lord has blessed me with such wonderful family - it takes my breath away. That my life's journey has been gifted with love, laughter and tears - it takes my breath away. That my daughters have now joined this circle - it takes my breath away.
Through this legacy of love I've been taught how to extend my circle to include others in need of breathless moments in their lives, and I'm thankful...so thankful!
Friday, October 3, 2008
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Perfection and Preparedness
I'm ashamed to admit that my family is one of those that seems to NEVER be prepared for the unexpected and RARELY prepared for the expected. This weekend is one of those "expected and still not ready" kind of weekends! Our church will host her sister churches and numerous travelers at an annual three-day meeting beginning Friday morning. The meeting will find us fellowshipping, singing, praising (and of course eating!). My church sisters and I have been planning meals, grocery lists, and prepping the church kitchen for weeks in anticipation of this event that we are honored to host every three years. We truly look forward to this time of year, especially when it is our turn to host the event. I think we're ready -- the church, that is!
My home is a different story. If our beloved brethren were to arrive today, they would have to carefully tip-toe their way through stacks of homeschooling materials being sorted in the family room, rubbermaid containers of 4-H files and show supplies in the living room, and boxes of outgrown horse show clothes in the dining room. Sigh...even though I know every year that company is coming this particular weekend, I can never seem to be prepared ahead of time for them! (You'd think I'd learn.) My husband on the other hand (a former military man, bless his heart!), abides by the motto "proper planning prevents poor performance." It's fair to say he's been a bit agitated by the clutter we're been surrounded with. He doesn't handle clutter very well, but he hasn't complained...much.
I have faced the struggle of "perfectionism" vs "preparedness" many times in my life. The perfectionist in me starts cleaning closets, book shelves, cabinets, and cubby holes about a month in advance of any big event, which seems like a good idea at the time. Problem with that: I rarely get the chance to completely finish any task in perfection. So, in order to be "prepared" instead, I shove everything into the garage to hide it until I can try again later.
The above prelude brings me to consider the spirtual aspects of being "perfect" vs being "prepared." In Ephesians 6 we are instructed to prepare for our daily battles this way: "Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; and your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God..." This is a daily preparation, my friends. We may all struggle with a desire to be "perfect," but all we're really asked to be is "prepared." Since I can never reach "perfection" by hiding my junk in a closet (or a garage!), I better let go of the junk and give it to the Lord. Only HE can make it perfect!
My home is a different story. If our beloved brethren were to arrive today, they would have to carefully tip-toe their way through stacks of homeschooling materials being sorted in the family room, rubbermaid containers of 4-H files and show supplies in the living room, and boxes of outgrown horse show clothes in the dining room. Sigh...even though I know every year that company is coming this particular weekend, I can never seem to be prepared ahead of time for them! (You'd think I'd learn.) My husband on the other hand (a former military man, bless his heart!), abides by the motto "proper planning prevents poor performance." It's fair to say he's been a bit agitated by the clutter we're been surrounded with. He doesn't handle clutter very well, but he hasn't complained...much.
I have faced the struggle of "perfectionism" vs "preparedness" many times in my life. The perfectionist in me starts cleaning closets, book shelves, cabinets, and cubby holes about a month in advance of any big event, which seems like a good idea at the time. Problem with that: I rarely get the chance to completely finish any task in perfection. So, in order to be "prepared" instead, I shove everything into the garage to hide it until I can try again later.
The above prelude brings me to consider the spirtual aspects of being "perfect" vs being "prepared." In Ephesians 6 we are instructed to prepare for our daily battles this way: "Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; and your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God..." This is a daily preparation, my friends. We may all struggle with a desire to be "perfect," but all we're really asked to be is "prepared." Since I can never reach "perfection" by hiding my junk in a closet (or a garage!), I better let go of the junk and give it to the Lord. Only HE can make it perfect!
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Summertime
Have you ever considered how many songs there are about "summertime?" The one that started this thought this morning was the old blues-y "Summertime and the livin's easy..." I sang it out loud (and then laughed when it occurred to me that I could learn a little bit from that first line!). Since I constantly have songs swimming through my brain, I immediately jumped from that lazy dreamy tune to the much faster tempo of "Summertime, summertime, sum-sum-summertime..." (which seems to more aptly fit the pace our family keeps!). If I would ask my daughters for a summertime song, they would of course mention the Kenny Chesney song, "two bare feet on the dashboard.....Perfect song on the radio......it's a smile, it's a kiss, it's a sip of wine, it's summertime." Being a kid once myself, I'm transported back to the memories of many-a-time on the front porch swing with my momma and little sis singing "In the good old summertime, in the good old summertime, Strolling through the shady lanes with your baby mine." (My sister and I would always giggle when we got to the part "she's your tootsey wootsey!") My, how music has changed over the years...and oh, how the pace of life has changed as well! But as much as I love looking back on the seemingly slower days of my youth, I would never want to trade these faster-paced, fun and fulfilling days of NOW!
The "Big Event" in the B5 family summertime is the Wayne County 4-H Fair. We were blessed to spend nine days with our daughters and ever-increasing circle of adopted family of 4-H'ers. What a treat! Of course we were exhausted by week's end, but wouldn't trade the memories, experiences, or the opportunities the Lord provided us to touch those young lives for any amount of extra zzzzzz's! Yet another blessing awaited us upon our return home to our Jordan's Crossing family. Our student list is quickly expanding, and the smiles, hugs and laughs we experience in this daily journey bring us so much joy!
Yes, it is "SUMMERTIME." The livin' here may not be exactly easy (we don't usually experience shady lane strolls with our tootsey wootsey, after all!), but it isn't hard to flip on the radio and tap our bare feet to that perfect song, or take a moment to dance through the sum-sum-summer tasks. And though that may not sound like much, it's always enough to make us happy. And isn't that what summertime is really all about?
The "Big Event" in the B5 family summertime is the Wayne County 4-H Fair. We were blessed to spend nine days with our daughters and ever-increasing circle of adopted family of 4-H'ers. What a treat! Of course we were exhausted by week's end, but wouldn't trade the memories, experiences, or the opportunities the Lord provided us to touch those young lives for any amount of extra zzzzzz's! Yet another blessing awaited us upon our return home to our Jordan's Crossing family. Our student list is quickly expanding, and the smiles, hugs and laughs we experience in this daily journey bring us so much joy!
Yes, it is "SUMMERTIME." The livin' here may not be exactly easy (we don't usually experience shady lane strolls with our tootsey wootsey, after all!), but it isn't hard to flip on the radio and tap our bare feet to that perfect song, or take a moment to dance through the sum-sum-summer tasks. And though that may not sound like much, it's always enough to make us happy. And isn't that what summertime is really all about?
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Make it a blessed day!
When logging on this morning I was shocked to notice that I haven't posted anything new for over a month! Time flies around here these days.
The past few weeks has been a mixture events ranging between joy and sorrow - we're honored to be included in the celebrations of nine graduating seniors (congrats to all!). We've also attended four funeral services for church brethren and loved ones.
This combination of celebrations in life and in death brings me to ponder how I have grown in the past 20-odd years and what I'm doing with the life the Lord has blessed me with. I remember graduating from high school as if it were yesterday. I was ecstatic to be done with school and, believing I was invincible, looked forward to starting a new job, making money, and spending the money I made. That was as far as my dreams of the future could take me that summer. I seriously doubt that my thoughts were any different than most of the students in my graduating class that year since the "here and now" is what's most important at that stage in life. But years down the road, life experiences and responsibilities force us to look beyond the "here and now" to the future...there's the obvious things like "how will I possibly manage the shcedule next week?!" And of course there are the more difficult things like financial planning for our childrens' college education and our retirement. But in the whirl of fulfilling our schedule and preparing for future milestones, I don't think I ever take enough time to take care of today, enjoying the blessings in it. Ironically, the "here and now" is really what's most important, for it is in today that I can secure a legacy for my children and future generations. Deuteronomy 6:5-7 says "And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart; And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up." This instruction is for today. Fuilfilling this commandment each day is, ultimately, the security of the future. And so, it is my prayer that I will take time to enjoy today, because I don't know when my todays will end, and at the end of my life I don't want to be filled with sorrow thinking I spent too much time pondering the past and/or preparing for the future.
Make it a BLESSED day TODAY!
The past few weeks has been a mixture events ranging between joy and sorrow - we're honored to be included in the celebrations of nine graduating seniors (congrats to all!). We've also attended four funeral services for church brethren and loved ones.
This combination of celebrations in life and in death brings me to ponder how I have grown in the past 20-odd years and what I'm doing with the life the Lord has blessed me with. I remember graduating from high school as if it were yesterday. I was ecstatic to be done with school and, believing I was invincible, looked forward to starting a new job, making money, and spending the money I made. That was as far as my dreams of the future could take me that summer. I seriously doubt that my thoughts were any different than most of the students in my graduating class that year since the "here and now" is what's most important at that stage in life. But years down the road, life experiences and responsibilities force us to look beyond the "here and now" to the future...there's the obvious things like "how will I possibly manage the shcedule next week?!" And of course there are the more difficult things like financial planning for our childrens' college education and our retirement. But in the whirl of fulfilling our schedule and preparing for future milestones, I don't think I ever take enough time to take care of today, enjoying the blessings in it. Ironically, the "here and now" is really what's most important, for it is in today that I can secure a legacy for my children and future generations. Deuteronomy 6:5-7 says "And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart; And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up." This instruction is for today. Fuilfilling this commandment each day is, ultimately, the security of the future. And so, it is my prayer that I will take time to enjoy today, because I don't know when my todays will end, and at the end of my life I don't want to be filled with sorrow thinking I spent too much time pondering the past and/or preparing for the future.
Make it a BLESSED day TODAY!
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