Viva la Mexico

The B5 Gang split up last week when Cowboy and I embarked on a much-needed vacation. Rising at o’dark-thirty, we tossed a few things in bags, kissed Girl 1, Girl 2 & Girl 3 (who didn’t get out of bed to see us off, btw), and headed to the airport. Everything went right…no traffic, quickly found airport parking in the economy long-term lot, immediately picked up by the shuttle, early check-in sped us through the ticket counter, and upon arrival at our gate were told that we would board early and leave early.  YAY! 

The flight was great…no turbulence, smooth landing. We landed 20 minutes early in Cancun, Mexico, and at 10:00 a.m. it was already a sunny 75 degrees. We easily slipped through immigration, found our bags waiting at the luggage carousel, handed our customs paperwork to the attendant, bypassed the vultures trying to sell timeshares in the lobby, and a driver called us by name, escorting us to his van.

Traffic was light, and in 20 minutes we were at Puerto Cancun. I slipped inside, bought two ferry tickets to the lovely Isla Mujeres, boarded the ferry, and in no time at all the captain began backing away from the dock.  I lay my head on Cowboy’s shoulder, breathed in the salt air, felt the tropical breeze blowing through my hair, and must have taken a bit of a siesta, because before I knew it, we were at the resort. A bellman unloaded our bags, opened his arms wide, and said “Welcome home!”

Ahhh…(deep, dramatic, contented sigh…) There could be only one explanation for the easy-breezy path there…

The entire universe had conspired to put us right there, in that very place, at that very time. This could mean only one thing:  I BELONG in Mexico. I was smiling. Cowboy was smiling. The resort staff was smiling. Even those silly Mayan gods must have been smiling.

Our week was amazing. Views previously enjoyed but erased by the passage of time once again flooded our vision. We took in every morsel of it, intent on memorizing the horizon, the crystal clear turquoise waters of the Caribbean, the reflection of the sun’s rays on each surface, the rumble of the waves.  Each night we fell asleep to the sound of waves crashing at our balcony, and awoke to the same. We soaked up the sun and wiggled our toes in sand. We marveled at sea stars, sting rays & colorful fish. We were captivated by pink sunrises, golden sunsets & burning red full-moon dusks. We watched as streaks of lightning pierced a dark night sky, and a colorful rainbow graced the morning's dawn. We met new friends, learned their stories, laughed with them, cried with them, and shared our common faith in the Creator who blessed us to be there together, embracing the beauty that surrounded us. It was an awesome week.

And suddenly, it was Friday evening…the night before the dreaded moving-out-and-going-home day. Cowboy and I decided to deviate from our normal routine and walk into town for dinner. Mistake #1. Never EVER leave a gorgeous, tranquil, private beach with lovely resort restaurant for a tent restaurant on a public beach. Never. Did you hear me? Don’t. Oh, the food was delicious, it was the experience that was excruciating. Inebriated girls stumbled into the sea and “somehow” lost their bikini bottoms. Men (and woman) blew cigar smoke right over our table. Two 60-something grannies decided to change their bathing suits, nearly losing their towels in the process. And then, as if a sign from above, it began to sprinkle. We walked back to our resort and stepped inside the lobby just as the skies opened up and torrential rains came pouring down.

Saturday morning we tossed our things in our bags, headed to the buffet for breakfast, said goodbye to our new friends, checked out of the resort, and headed to the ferry. Once there, I realized something important that would have been nice to have known exactly one week prior. Had I not been captivated by the easy-breezy path, I might have realized it sooner...I had purchased two round trip tickets for the ferry. Hmmm. Where WERE those tickets? Did I keep them? Did I toss them? As I opened suitcases, searched pockets, and dug through bags, the ferry pulled away from the dock. Darn.

After a thorough search, I came up empty handed. No tickets. Darn again. Cowboy rolled his eyes, approached the ticket booth, and bought two ONE WAY tickets to Cancun. We maneuvered our bags through the waiting area and plopped down on a bench. I opened the front zipper of my carry-on to stow away the receipts for the new tickets and guess what I found. Yeesh. The round trip tickets. Oops. This time a “SANDRA!” was attached to Cowboy’s eye-roll. Yikes.

We boarded the ferry, found a seat on the top deck, and made our way to the mainland as dark ominous clouds began to settle above us. We encountered traffic that doubled our transit time to the airport. We stood in a long line of grumpy passengers at the ticket counter, picked the wrong security checkpoint line, and got stuck behind a woman who apparently “looked suspicious” to the TSA. All the while, unbeknownst to us, a monsoon was fixin to hit Cancun. I’m not kidding. Monsoon.

We ambled to our gate where throngs of people filled the seats and overflowed to the floor. Sheets of rain pelted the windows. Grumpy home-goers were drinking their sorrows away in the airport bars. Annoying announcements were being made over ear-piercing loud speakers. Every flight was delayed by the storm.

We waited. And I got antsy. And we waited some more. And I paced.

Finally, four hours after we had arrived at the airport (two hours after we were scheduled to take off) our flight was called to board. “Just wait, San…no hurry,” said the cowboy. So I waited. Against my better judgment, I waited. I was the 2nd to the last person through the gate, and WHO do you think they chose for a “random search”…?  Me. They opened my carry-on, they opened my purse, they ran a metal-detector over me, they patted me down, and soon after they eradicated the last morsel of my dignity, they let me pass. And Cowboy chuckled. I saw it. And I wasn’t happy.

We descended the stairs to the tarmac where there was a bus waiting. Yes, a bus. The rains were so heavy that they were bussing passengers across the tarmac to the waiting plane. We boarded the bus, and I was mentally preparing to make a mad dash for those flight steps. I was DETERMINED to the be the FIRST ONE to board that dry plane, by golly! The other passengers were either old or carrying babies and car seats, so I was SURE I could win the race to the top.  My adrenaline was pumping…I was on my mark…and then Cowboy reached out, touched my arm and said “Just wait, San…no hurry.” So I waited. Against my better judgment, I waited. And I was the 2nd to the last person off the bus.

There was a looooong line of people on those steps waiting to board that plane. I was 2nd to the last in that never-ending line. I got wetter, and wetter, and wetter. The man behind me got impatient and began yelling “PUSH ‘EM IN AND RUN ‘EM OVER!” He sounded a lot like Cowboy (ahem). And it was in that moment that I realized…

The entire universe had conspired to put us right there, in that very place, at that very time. This could mean only one thing: Mexico was taunting me. I wasn’t smiling. Cowboy wasn’t smiling. The tarmac staff wasn’t smiling. And I silently cursed those stupid Mayan gods.

Hasta la vista, baby!

I Don’t Like Surprises

I have never ever liked surprises…not any surprise of any kind…at all. In 22 years of marriage Cowboy has tried three times to surprise me. The first time he came home from work early and said he was whisking me away for the weekend. I had a meltdown in the car. The second time he called me about an hour before he came home, saying nothing more than “pack a bag.” I had a mini-meltdown prior to his arrival. The third time he gave me nine days to absorb and prepare. He told me he’d learned a few things over the years. 

Keeping this in mind, imagine my surprise at a totally new revelation…me…the one who doesn’t like surprises…at 42 years of age…with three nearly grown children…PREGNANT?  GASP!  Now imagine the ensuing meltdown after realization struck.  It wasn’t pretty.

The first niggling thought hit me on Friday afternoon, March 18th.  I spent the afternoon with my nephew Grant, who is four, while my sister Nikki (who is expecting in July) taught a theatre class for our local homeschoolers.  When Grant and I returned from our excursion, Nikki and I sat talking for a moment about how she was feeling. She commented repeatedly about how quickly her belly was expanding. I put my arm around her shoulders in that big-sister way and said, “Sweetie, we both may have been born small in stature, but our pregnancies always make us big as boats…” and before I could finish voicing my thought, I felt the color drain from my face. Immediately my inward struggle began “Am I pregnant?… Me? ….I can’t be pregnant…can I?…Really, Lord…?…NO!…this can’t be happening…wait…I don’t even LIKE surprises!”  I suddenly felt very queasy. 

That night Lindsay, Lily, my mother, and I went to dinner and a high school play with my aunt Marjorie. I was with my family; I had looked forward to that night; I should have been enjoying it…but I was gloomy and miserable, and I was trying with all of my might to act normal and not show any signs of distress. The night is a blur…you’d have to ask them how it went.

The next day, Brian, his mother, and I drove to Lexington, Kentucky, to pick up Emma from her spring break internship.  I could not carry a conversation to save my soul. I was lost in thought, begging God, hoping my suspicions were wrong, and pushing down that growing feeling of nausea.

On Sunday following morning church services, I sat at the lunch table with my pregnant sister and our friend Carrie. The conversation quickly turned to pregnancy, of course. I was caught between the urge to bawl my eyes out and flee.

That evening, Cowboy looked at me and said “what is up with you?  Are you sick?  Are you upset about something? You’ve been acting strange for days.”  I could only stare back at him.  He continued, “Do we need to go somewhere and talk?”  I will never forget the look on his face when I said “Ummm…maybe…I don’t know for sure…I think I might have some news for you that could quite possibly bring a HUGE life-changing experience around November or so.” At his shrug, shake of head, and the look of “I’m-completely-confused-by-women,” I whispered “I…think…I…might…be…” and I put my hand on my belly.  His glance shifted to my deliberately-placed hand, and when his eyes returned to mine, I was somewhat amused by the wave of realization that I watched slowly roll over him.  There he stood, wide-eyed and speechless. Then he laughed, “YOU? The one who doesn’t like surprises…? Well, SURPRISE HONEY!”

On Monday I decided I had to know for sure, so I trekked to our local CVS and bought a pregnancy test.  Still in complete denial, I figured I had just wasted a perfectly good $10 bill, but to my horror the next morning, that little plus sign appeared.  I slowly descended the stairs to tell Cowboy the news.  Hands shaking, I held up the stick for him to see, and immediately incoherent drivel began tumbling out of his mouth, “What’s this mean?…The lighting in here is terrible…Do I see what I think I see?…Why are you shaking…?”

Yes.  Positive.  Pregnant.  Parents over 40 with three children half-way out of the nest, and there we stood…staring at the little pink plus sign that without uttering a single word told us definitively we would soon be starting ALL over.

I closed myself in my bedroom that Tuesday, March 22nd, and I cried.  I prayed for wisdom, guidance, and most of all DESIRE for the growing baby inside me.  “Lord, I need desire for this child…please give me the desire to be a new mother again!”  I sent crazy hormonal texts to Cowboy…. I can’t DO this! … What is God THINKING?  …  Can I DO this? … WHY????!!!! …  How long do you think we can keep this a secret? … Let’s not tell until June…maybe July… We’re good parents, right? …  This is a miracle, right? 

After about 50 of those messages, I received ONE in return: “We may think we have life all mapped out, but it’s not about us, it’s about God’s plan. It’s all about reconciliation. I love you.” 

I wanted to clutch my hands around his neck, squeeze and shake until his eyes popped out…but instead I sent one final message: “Is THAT supposed to make me feel BETTER?!”

From that moment, there was no end to the odd little conversations that swirled around me.  Had everyone always talked about babies and pregnancy as much as they were now?  What was WRONG with these people?!

For example, that Tuesday night, mere hours after my pregnancy was confirmed, we went to dinner with our good friends, Bruce and Ann.  Cowboy asked if I was up for it.  “It will be good for me,” I said, “take my mind off of this for a while.” No such luck. Bruce just HAD to share the story about a friend who, several years ago, was surprised by his wife’s pregnancy…one they had determined would NEVER happen…they had taken deliberate measures to ensure it wouldn’t. Bruce and Ann laughed whole-heartedly as he related the story. Brian and I just sat stunned.

On Wednesday I saw my chiropractor friend Dr. Julie, who had recently been in contact with another 40-something friend who’d just found out she was pregnant.  “She, like you, has a 20-year-old and a 16-year-old…can you IMAGINE?!” I stood there speechless as the thought ‘Er…ummm…uh…well…NO…honestly, I CAN’T imagine…and by the way, can I get her number….?’ raced through my head.  In the end, all I could utter was a simple “Wow.”

At the dinner table that evening, out of the clear blue sky, Lindsay asked “Mom, what exactly is post-partum depression?”  Okay, God…if THIS is the way you bring me around to DESIRE, you need to try a different approach…seriously…

By Friday I was so far into the denial stage that I had convinced myself something else was dreadfully wrong. I was SURE it must be some kind of life-threatening cancer which caused that dumb pregnancy test to show a false positive. Yes, that MUST be it…I needed to talk to Susan, my nurse friend. As I related my symptoms to Susan and told her about the pregnancy test (denial CLEARLY filling my soul), I saw a look of sympathy cross her face. She cocked her head to the side and gently said, “Honey, you’re pregnant.” I stood stunned. “No, no, no Sue…you aren’t hearing me…I CAN’T be pregnant. I can’t. Something else is horribly wrong.” Another sympathetic (or was that a ‘how-can-you-be-so-stupid?’) look, “No. Sandy. Listen to me. You’re pregnant.” Then she wrapped her arms around me tight, cried with me, prayed for me, and assured me it was okay to feel angry or mad or sad or hurt or whatever I felt…it would all come in due time…God’s timing is perfect. 

On Saturday, March 26th, we had a family luncheon with that gargantuan group of descendants named “Bane.”  Sixty-seven aunts, uncles & cousins gathered at MCL Cafeteria.  Among them all, there was ONE baby present. Baby Bentley. That precious, smiling, six-month-old wonder baby, who in his short lifetime, has already overcome a myriad of challenges. I held him, fed him his lunch, snuggled with him, and the entire time kept thinking “oh wow…I don’t think I can DO this!”  Brian took him from me just as a cousin looked over and said “Does that give you any ideas, guys?”  Another walked up and said “Whoa…did you guys forget to tell us something?!”  It was all in jest, of course, and I half-heartedly laughed, but the entire time I kept thinking “If ONLY you people KNEW!” 

Another Sunday rolled around, and during lunch, my dear friend Carrie and I were playing with toddler Luke.  She shot off the smart-alleck remark “It’s not too late for you and Brother Brian to have another one, you know!”  She laughed. I squirmed.

On Monday, the 28th I saw my massage therapist.  While she was cranking away on my sore shoulder, she said “Sandy, you spend so much time taking care of everyone else…tell me what you ever do for YOU when you have the time.” I nearly cried… TIME? WHAT TIME?  DON’T YOU KNOW I’M STARTING ALL OVER AGAIN?!  I simply answered “I don’t really know…I guess I’ll have to think on that,” then I followed up with an un-voiced prayer…. “Desire, dear Lord, please give me DESIRE!” 

On Tuesday, the 29th, we saw Bruce & Ann again. Ann said “Can you believe your babies will be all grown up soon?  What will you DO when you have an empty nest?!” I simply shrugged my shoulders and said “Oh…I have a feeling Brian and I will always be surrounded by kids.”  

Desire, Lord…Desire….I know I’m selfish…I admit it…but remember, I don’t like surprises!

Sunday, April 3rd. Beautiful sunny day. I sat soaking up the sun in my lawn chair, book in hand. Cowboy walked up behind me, wrapped his right arm around my neck, and placed his left hand on my belly. “I love both of you,” he whispered, then he kissed my cheek and walked away. As joyful tears filled my eyes, the weight of my guilt was lifted, and I felt an odd feeling wash over me.  “What IS this…?” I wondered, “Joy…?  Love…?  Happiness…?” Yes, all of the above, and maybe a just a tiny hint of desire. “Oh Lord, I am so humbled by your gifts…thank you!” 

I am richly blessed, I know this for a fact. I’m beginning to come around.  Maybe this surprise won’t turn out to be so bad after all!

It’s a BOY!

“Pablo” was born to Baby on Sunday, April 17, shortly after midnight.  We are so very proud of this little guy!

He’s a real beauty, and a people-lover!  We can’t wait for you to meet him!

Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

The week of April 11 was rough for Cowboy and Girl 2.  Nightly checks at two-hour intervals were beginning to take their toll, and Cowboy was staggering around looking like he hadn’t slept in days.  When he came inside for breakfast following his early morning mare check, he said every sign was telling him we would soon have a foal.  Yep, he was sure it was going to happen TODAY!  He muttered something incoherent like “she’s really bagged up…looks like she’s waxing…soft in the poll…uhh…no, wait…I’M the one soft in the poll….SHE’S soft at the dock!”  (For you non-horse people out there, the “dock,” or top of the tail, gets soft just before a mare goes into the labor…the “poll,” on the other hand, is the top of a horse’s head!) It was very plain to see Cowboy needed a good long night of uninterrupted sleep.  But as we all know, there is no rest for the weary…and good things come to those who wait.

Cowboy and I had a meeting to attend, so arrangements were made for Girl 2 to stay behind and keep an eye on things, and she had strict instructions to text message me if anything started happening.  By 11:00 a.m. I was SURE she must be in the the middle of a tough delivery and she hadn’t texted me yet (the nerve!), so I sent her a message:

ME: “anything happening?”

EMMA: “nope. just moving around alot. how close are they when water breaks?”

ME: “CLOSE! Her water broke?”

EMMA: “no.”

I did a mental eye roll and then a new messaged popped up.

EMMA:  “when i go out to the barn she stands still and munches on hay. when i go inside she starts pacing and breathing hard.”

ME:  “stay out of the barn until she is down on the ground. i know from experience when you’re in labor you just want to be left alone.”

EMMA: “mom…really?…TMI.”

(For those of you not up on the acronym lingo, TMI stands for ‘Too Much Information.’)  I giggled and tossed my phone in my purse.  I would wait.  Good things come to those who wait.

When we returned home from our meeting, we anticipated a mare lying in her stall, but no…Baby stood in the corner, tossing her head at us.  Lifting her nose and curling her lips, she glared at us in defiance as if to say “GET OUT OF MY BARN!”

11:00 p.m.: still no foal. Cowboy scheduled “foal watch” with Girl 1 and Girl 2, and we headed to bed.

12:21 p.m.: I was rudely awakened by a slamming door and sat straight up in bed. I muttered to Brian “I think we have a baby,” as I heard boots running through the family room and up the stairs.  Girl 1 poked her head in the bedroom door, “DAD!  THERE’S A FOAL ON THE GROUND!” Then she turned on her heel and ran back down the stairs.

Cowboy laid, breathing deeply, no movement.  I reached out and touched him, “Brian…there’s a foal on the ground.”  He turned toward me, but laid silent. 

“Brian, are you awake?  Honey, Baby had her foal….” 

Slowly he sat up, and I could see him trying to clear his head.  He stood, walked to the bedroom door, closed it, then returned to the foot of the bed and looked at me. 

“Honey, turn on the light and get your clothes on,” I said, “Do you know what’s happening?” 

“Ummmm…yeah…something is in the house…?”

“No dear, it’s the foal.  Baby had her foal.”

“What?! How in the devil did it get in the HOUSE?"!”

Okay, this is where I realized some SERIOUS intervention would be necessary…so I got a little loud…

“BRIAN! GET YOUR CLOTHES ON AND GO TO THE BARN; THERE’S A FOAL ON THE GROUND!”

That did it.  He jumped as if shocked by a ‘ZAP!’  “Oh my GOSH!”  He grabbed his pants and his boots and took off for the barn.

By the time we reached the barn, the foal was on the ground, Baby was standing over him.  Within minutes, Pablo was up on his long wobbly legs, trying to get around to his momma, but he couldn’t quite figure out how to nurse.  So we waited…and waited…and waited…

At 2:00 a.m., Pablo was still standing, pacing back and forth in the stall, and he still hadn’t found the path to the udder.  I announced I was going back to bed. “I hope he figures out how to nurse soon,” I said, “he sure is a strong little guy; he hasn’t laid down yet!”

At 2:15 a.m., Brian joined me in the bedroom.  “The girls are going to watch him until he starts nursing.  I need some sleep.”

At 2:30 a.m., Lindsay popped her head in the door, “Dad, he’s still not nursing and he won’t lay down either.”  Brian sighed deeply and said “Can you give me about 30 more minutes?”  She could.  She did.  3:00 a.m. came around pretty quickly, and she knocked on the door once again.  “Dad…?  Still nothing…I can’t keep my eyes open any longer.”  Once again, Cowboy rose, pulled on his pants and boots, and headed back to the barn.

At 5:00 a.m., I went out to see if I could relieve him and give him a chance to sleep.  Church would be starting in 5 short hours, and Cowboy was going to have to preach.  He really needed some rest.  When I got to the barn, he was on his knees milking Baby, trying to save as much of that all-important colostrum he could save.  “He still can’t do it, and he still has not laid down. Dummy Foal Syndrome. I called the vet.”  Three hours later, still no nursing, still no laying down, still no vet.  But good things come to those who wait.  Patiently.  Or…not so patiently. 

At 9:00 a.m., the vet finally arrived to a very sleepy (but still refusing to lie down) and quickly dehydrating (nine hours, no nourishment) foal.  Doc took a quick look, said “He’s too pretty to let anything happen to him, let’s fix this!” And in short order, the colt was tubed, the momma milked, and colostrum distributed directly into the colt’s stomach.  Pablo soon found his way to the ground, took his first nap, and we waited.  At 11:15 a.m., he stood and nursed for the first time!  See…good things come to those who wait!

Following church I asked Cowboy to lay down and nap for a while, but he insisted he would be fine.  I don’t know how he did it, but he got through the day on about 2 hours of sleep.  At 8:45 p.m., his head hit the pillow and he was out like a light. I wish I could say the story ends there.  But no.  At 9:00 p.m., there was a soft knock on our bedroom door, and Girl 2 peeked in.  “Dad…?  You awake…?  Pablo is constipated and really straining.  I think he needs an enema.”  From the lump next to me came a low rumbling growl.  Cowboy sat up…pulled on his pants and boots…mumbled “why do I DO this?” and he descended the stairs, journeying again to the barn.

And guess what…?  We are expecting foal #2 any day!  Good things come to those who wait.

When A Cowboy Travels

Cowboy and I come from a long line of home bodies. We never have been good travelers; we prefer to just be home. This past weekend, however, we were provided an opportunity to expand our definition of “HOME” when we travelled to a little town called Cannonsburg in eastern Kentucky. 

Early in our marriage when we had two tiny children and nothing but time, Cowboy and I traveled frequently to attend church meetings. We have been blessed to meet church people from Indiana, Ohio, Kentucky, Illinois, Missouri, Georgia, Alabama, and Texas. Once upon a time, when Girl #2 was only six weeks old, we met a wonderful preacher, Elder Glenn, who asked us to visit his church in the Ohio/Kentucky/West Virginia tri-state area. Sixteen years and huge guilty conscience later, we did just that.  It was a visit long-overdue…but I’ll get to that in a minute…first I have to tell you about our welcoming committee in that area of Kentucky. 

Our first official “state” meeting came soon after crossing the border. Two gentlemen in an ancient pick up truck were driving very slowly in the left lane. The truck, decked with a truck-cap-style camper perched precariously on the rusted bed and held in place with bungee cords, had no side or rear view mirrors. The camper was whopper-jawed in a way that made the truck look as if it was strolling sideways down the road. Cowboy determined that Uncle Cletus had bumped a little too hard against one side wall in his sleep, sending the whole kit and kaboodle rolling into a ditch. Poor fella. But as we cautiously passed them on the right, we noted Uncle Cletus looked alive and well as he sat driving that old truck with his nephew riding shotgun, a trusty pit bull between them. It couldn’t have been a more fitting scene had the words “WELCOME TO THE BLUEGRASS STATE” been emblazoned on the back bumper!

Our first “in-person” meeting was with Jimmy, who worked the counter at the Hampton Inn Ashland. His friendly welcoming smile and sweet southern accent diverted my attention away from the first impression of faded blue jeans and a button-down shirt open to reveal what must have been his favorite tee. He gave us our room key, explained that it worked better if you swipe them slowly, informed us that snacks and coffee were around the corner, wished us a wonderful stay, and told us to call the front desk if we needed “anything…anything at all.” And we knew he meant it.

Cowboy and I boarded the elevator, pressed the button for the 2nd floor and made our way down the hall to find the doorplate of our room (#233) adorned with a picture of a white cowboy hat. It made Cowboy feel very special to think they reserved that particular room just for him.

After depositing our bags in the room, we ventured back downstairs just in time to meet up with our church friends Elder Frank and his wife, who treated us to dinner at a nearby Bob Evans, where we met Julie, our waitress. Julie was a lively, fun and spunky red head who called us all “baby,” and high-fived the preacher Frank when she learned he was a Wildcats fan (ahem…who ISN’T a Wildcats fan in Kentucky?).

After taking our drink orders, Julie turned to Cowboy and asked “Where y’all from?” Cowboy replied “Indiana.” Julie looked at him quizzically, then started, “You know, I went to Indiana once with my boyfriend to a big monster truck rally thing that he likes…anyway…it was in Indy, at that Lucas Oil stadium…? I kept sayin ‘what in the world do they have all these huge pictures of Peyton Manning for…do they like him here or somethin?’” Stifling a giggle, Cowboy explained that Lucas Oil Stadium is THE Colt’s stadium… “you know, where they play?”    “Ooooooh” she said, “that makes COMPLETE sense now!”  Julie was a southern sweetheart we Hoosiers couldn’t help but fall in love with. She apparently felt the same since she spent many long moments with us sharing stories about her boyfriend, her church, her daddy, and her Wildcats (the 2009 team was her favorite).

Being the home body that I am, it was evident very early on that we needed to make a stop at the local Wal-Mart.  Being the man that he is, Cowboy dropped me at the door and said he’d wait in the car.  Even in the relative solitude of the car, it didn’t take long before he made a friend.  As Cowboy sat fiddling with the radio, he looked up to see a woman walking toward him, pushing several Wal-Mart carts. She motioned for him to roll down his window.  Surprised by the gesture, Cowboy complied, and she began to explain, “My husband is inside doin our shoppin. I didn’t feel like goin in, so I figured I could gather up the carts while I’m waitin.”  Cowboy wasn’t sure if this was her way of pointing out that he should also find something productive to do, or if she was just being friendly. It turned out to be the latter. After finishing her commentary, she prepared to walk away, but first said “Nice car, by the way!” Yes, there are definitely some friendly folk in that neck of the woods, and they fulfilled their “welcome committee” duties quite well.

Without a doubt, the best part of the trip was arriving at the church for their Saturday night meeting. It was there, in that humble little building that Cowboy finally had the 16-year reunion with Elder Glen that he’d been longing for. Elder Glen proudly announced to everyone that he “knew this young man when he was but a little boy!” (We didn’t have the heart to remind him that Cowboy was a grown and married man with two young children at the time of their first meeting!) In addition to the reunion with Elder Glen and his wife, we met Brenda, Geneva, Katie, Joe, Charlie, and so many many more whose names currently escape me, but whose love for the Lord and their church family was certainly undeniable. They shared with us, hugged us, asked about our lives, our blessings, our church, and our family. They encouraged us with their words of wisdom and their pure hearts.  And it was there, in that little town 4-1/2 hours from home, that we realized we were home. 

This weekend, in Cannonsburg, Kentucky, we found it to be true…home really IS where your heart is. <3

Old Dogs and New Tricks

If you happened to check out our blog sometime between Thursday and Saturday (that is today) you may have been a bit perplexed at the weird things going on here.  I was doing some sprucing up.   First and foremost, you can now punch in a new website name to get here, and her's our web name:  http://www.theb5gang.com/  Isn't that COOL?  It's SOOO much easier than typing "jordanscrossingriding.blogspot.com" in your brower, don't you think?  Eventually that may become a full fledged website instead of just forwarding you to blogger, but we'll see how good I get.

Which brings me to the next item I spruced up...I have wanted to learn new graphics arts tricks ever since I invested in Corel’s Paint Shop Pro software three years ago.  (Yes, three years is a long time for software to sit, and yes, it is likely outdated, but that's the way it goes around here.)  Anyhoo...on Thursday, I decided Blogspot was too boring for me.  After all, they only give you boring stuff and junky templates and there is just no fun in that, so I decided I wanted to design my own web page (hence, the purchase of http://www.theb5gang.com/).  Well, I kinda put my cart before my horse, you see, and we all know that ain't good.  After I purchased my web site, I figured out that in true web page design you have to know something about HTML codes, and that's when my eyes glazed over. 

Still, I did find some very interesting things that allowed me to change our site into what you see here!  All I had to do was pull up my trusty old Bing internet search tool and punch in “create background for blog” and up popped the most MAHVELOUS site that walked me step-by-step through the process of creating lovely backgrounds.  I was instantly hooked, and I made about a bazillion backgrounds and buttons between Thursday and Friday.  (That's what happens when a person has an addict's personality.  It's what we call "overboard.") 

After creating my bazillion different backgrounds with my outdated Corel Paint Shop Pro software, I had to figure out how to post the blasted things.  Ick.  It was HTML codes again, and let me tell ya something else I learned:  Obsessed-Graphic-Artist-Wanna-Be does not a programmer make!  Ick (did I say that already?).  Not only was it confusing and frustrating, it made me feel like an old dog trying to learn a new trick. 
I messed and fudged and messed with blasted codes until I FINALLY got my background to pop up correctly, then I messed and fudged and messed some more to make it fit right, only to realize I hated the background.  So I deleted the stupid thing and started over with a different one…then another one.  I think I finally settled on #4 which you may (or may not) see here.  If you can see it … GREAT!  If you can’t…well…sorry. 

Now if you are like me and you have NO CLUE about HTML codes and silly programming stuff, you can skip this paragraph and go to the next one, BUT if you are a code whiz (that’s not the same as cheez whiz, mind you) and you can tell me HOW to make my template float between…oh, say 1600 pixels wide to 1000 pixels wide, depending on the user...I would REALLY appreciate you leaving a "thunk about it" clue at the end of this post.  My background (created at 1600px x 1100 px) fits lovely on my new big computer’s screen (1980px x 1080px), but looks hideous on my old tiny computer screen (1024px x 728px).  I can’t figure out how to fix this tootin thing no matter how hard I try, so I quit trying.  (Sorry if you read that entire last paragraph and zoned out.  I warned you not to read it.  Maybe next time you’ll listen.)

Now, if you’re still here and coherent, I also updated our various pages (you can find the links at the top of this post and to the right under that handy button I created that says "pages").  I stuck a few old photos on the “Our History” page.  I tried really really hard not to post embarrassing photos.  You have no idea how tempting it was to post embarrassing pictures, because I seriously have a TON of them…

Pics of Cowboy riding the little tiny pony Dusty, his feet dragging the ground. 

Pics of Girl 1 at the age of 11 feeding horses while wearing shorts and her daddy’s huge rubber muck boots.

Pics of Girl 2 at the age of 8 glaring and wrapping her long hair around her face because she hated having her picture taken.

Pics of Girl 3 in various dramatic poses at the age of…oh wait, that may have been a picture from yesterday….it’s hard to tell…she always strikes dramatic poses. 

Of course there were absolutely NO embarrassing pictures of me because I burned all of them, but I hope you enjoy what’s here, and CODE WHIZZES…leave me "fix-it thunk its" by clicking the little white envelope thingy down there.  The rest of you can leave other "thunk it's.".  I promise I'll read them.

Wow, it's only been two weeks since my last post?! Maybe I'm beginning a new pattern here! (Eh, don't hold your breath...)

Today Brian had an opportunity to visit the Agape therapeutic riding center in Cicero, Indiana. He came home with pictures, stories, and excitement for all he witnessed there, having found great inspiration. We've been praying for guidance and direction for Jordan's Crossing lately. We have had impressions that it's time to expand our program, though we're not exactly sure yet what that will entail. Your prayers in this area would be appreciated as well.

On Thursday of this week we will exhibit at Reid Hospital's Pediatric Resource Fair. If any of you plan to attend, please stop by our booth and say hello!

New Season, New Students

The hint of fall is in the air! We can see it, smell it, and feel it. Autumn is our family's favorite time of year. This season finds us juggling our schedules as riding students return to school and try to work around their own busy schedules. We recently increased to 25 students. We're not exactly sure how that happened so quickly, but we're enjoying the hustle, bustle, and flurry of activity as new students become part of our Jordan's Crossing family! Some have special needs, some are just looking for an opportunity to be with horses, but whatever their needs, they are always welcome here. Please pray collectively for our students and their varying needs, and don't forget to reach out a helping hand to others around you who may need some encouragement along their rocky road. Happy Fall! :)

Where Does the Time Go?

For months I've been thinking I should update our blog. It seems only yesterday we were laughing at Shotgun's Predicament, but more than half a year has passed since then! Where did the time go?

So much has happened since my last posting, and I could kick myself for not having a journal record of it all. Emma celebrated her 14th birthday, a new foal was born, we went on our annual spring trail riding vacation, many new students started riding at Jordan's Crossing, Lily performed in her third dance recital, Lindsay graduated from high school...where did the time go?

We just completed the 2009 Wayne County 4-H Fair. We were there for 9 days and 8 nights, but it flew by with a "WHOOSH!" It seemed we were moving in one day...moving out the next.
It was Lindsay's 10th and final year as a 4-H member, and it was so difficult to wake up every day thinking "this is her last one." 10 years of memories flashed through my mind so many times this week, and I kept asking myself "where did the time go?"

It seems everything moves so much faster these days. We stay so busy. Days swirl around us and fade away before we even realize we've lived them. I find myself trying desperately to capture every moment of these special days and hold them -- just briefly -- in my memory. And still...I sit and wonder..."where did the time go?"

Farewell Dear Friend

Diamond (1999 - 2008)

Tonight we bid a tearful goodbye to our faithful family friend, Diamond. A loving companion, dependable watch dog, fun playmate, and sweet greeter of visitors, she will be sorely missed by our family and students.

Make it a blessed day!

When logging on this morning I was shocked to notice that I haven't posted anything new for over a month! Time flies around here these days.

The past few weeks has been a mixture events ranging between joy and sorrow - we're honored to be included in the celebrations of nine graduating seniors (congrats to all!). We've also attended four funeral services for church brethren and loved ones.

This combination of celebrations in life and in death brings me to ponder how I have grown in the past 20-odd years and what I'm doing with the life the Lord has blessed me with. I remember graduating from high school as if it were yesterday. I was ecstatic to be done with school and, believing I was invincible, looked forward to starting a new job, making money, and spending the money I made. That was as far as my dreams of the future could take me that summer. I seriously doubt that my thoughts were any different than most of the students in my graduating class that year since the "here and now" is what's most important at that stage in life. But years down the road, life experiences and responsibilities force us to look beyond the "here and now" to the future...there's the obvious things like "how will I possibly manage the shcedule next week?!" And of course there are the more difficult things like financial planning for our childrens' college education and our retirement. But in the whirl of fulfilling our schedule and preparing for future milestones, I don't think I ever take enough time to take care of today, enjoying the blessings in it. Ironically, the "here and now" is really what's most important, for it is in today that I can secure a legacy for my children and future generations. Deuteronomy 6:5-7 says "And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart; And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up." This instruction is for today. Fuilfilling this commandment each day is, ultimately, the security of the future. And so, it is my prayer that I will take time to enjoy today, because I don't know when my todays will end, and at the end of my life I don't want to be filled with sorrow thinking I spent too much time pondering the past and/or preparing for the future.

Make it a BLESSED day TODAY!

Vacationing and Homecoming

Business as usual has prevented me from posting for a while. Spring has sprung and we have been keeping very busy.

Before I share the details of our recent vacation, however, I must brag on my two oldest daughters and our "adopted" family of 4H members comprising the Wayne County 4H Equine Judging Team. Two weeks ago our senior and junior teams traveled to Alexandria, Indiana, to take part in the area 4H & FFA equine judging competition. Both teams gained a spot at the state competition to be held this weekend by placing 4th (seniors) and 1st (juniors). As two of only three returning veterans, Lindsay and Emma were both surprised by and thrilled with their teams' performances. The excitement intensified, however, when the individual results were revealed a few days later. Our daughters were at the top of the lists! Lindsay placed 2nd overall in the senior division and Emma placed 1st overall in the junior division. We are so very proud of our girls and just as equally as proud of their team members' collective achievements. GREAT JOB Wayne County!!

Moving on...Last week we were blessed to enjoy some much-needed relaxation time on our camping/trail riding vacation. Late into the night Sunday found us packing two trucks and two trailers, and after rising early Monday morning, we loaded our three daughters, two of our dogs, and five of our horses for the two-hour drive to meet our friends at Brown County State Park near Nashville, Indiana. What a TREAT! We have ridden the trails in Brown County several times in the past, but have never had the opportunity to stay five nights and six days. Our extended stay allowed us to seek out trails we'd never ridden before, and it was a wonderful trip! We could not have hand picked better weather. Sun beams and warm breezes followed us down hillsides and up ridges each day as we logged 75 miles and 36 hours of riding for the week. We were blessed to see the majesty of God's creation unfold a little more each day as tiny buds which graced trees and shrubbery on Monday turned to full-blown foliage by Saturday. Wondrous sights awaited us in areas that would have been too difficult to traverse on foot or by car. Trail riding is a favorite past time for our family, and this spring's experience was certainly no exception! If you've never observed the beauty of God's creation on horseback, we highly recommend it! Here are a couple of photos of the trails:
Above: Brian and the girls make their way on the trail. This was our first ride of the week when horses and humans are still fresh! Below: Ballenger and Abernathy families in the valley of trail 7 on the way to Story.As difficult as it was to think about leaving Brown County Saturday afternoon, we were all truly longing for home. It was nice to pull into our driveway, get out of the truck, and hear the nickers of our equine family members who had been left behind all week. They may have been happy to see us, but they were THRILLED to see their siblings! Brian and I laughed as we stood at the fence and watched them all once again determine their places in the pecking order. Baby, Dixie, Sassy, Tango, and Shotgun served us well on the trails of Brown County, and we smiled as they each took a few well-deserved rolls in the pasture. They seemed just as happy to be home as the human members of the B5 Gang!

Emma can't seem to find the right end of Sassy! Acutally, she's prepping her saddle bags for the morning trail ride.
Tango decides he needs a little nap before he hits the trail again. Lindsay takes the opportunity to use him as a leaning post.
Lily and Sandy enjoy a moment together in the quiet scenery offered at trail's end in Story, Indiana.

Looking for Signs of Spring

We've been teased with a few peeks of sunshine and warm breezes lately, and it's causing us to look a little closer for those tell-tale signs of spring we "Hoosiers" get excited about. The green shoots of the lily plants have poked through the ground, buds are forming on my lilac shrub, and robins are rockin' around the barn. (I can't think of a more pleasing spring morning combination than a hot cup of coffee in my hand and the sound of a robin's song as I sit at the breakfast table. Joy!) The coming of spring also brings about a few extra chores that have been awaiting better weather. Brian has been working on our "old" barn which is being converted into equipment storage, and building fence for two additional horse turnouts.



A double-whammy prevented me from posting last week: first I was sick (thankfully I was the only member of our family who came down with that nasty little virus), and then our modem went bad. We were lost without internet and email acitivty for the first couple of days, but it didn't take long for us to realize that life really does go on without access to the world wide web! Of course it made a few items of business quite a bit more difficult, but we were able to manage.



I have new photos to post this time. The first batch is from the surprise birthday party we had for Emma on her 13th birthday in February. We were blessed with a BEAUTIFUL day and were thrilled to celebrate with about 40 guests in our barn.










The second batch is of the color guard team that Lindsay and Emma enjoy riding with. We were happy to offer the team an indoor riding opportunity on that extremely COLD night two weeks ago!




We're looking forward to hosting another 4H club's clinic in two weeks and plan to post photos from that event in upcoming blogs.

Happy Signs-of-Spring Hunting to you all!

Visitors, visitors

What a blessing our barn has already been in its short span of existence! Brian and I have been kicking ourselves for not yet starting a visitor's book for the barn, so we sat down this morning to brainstorm and write down names of people who have come to the barn since its completion. Our brainstorming session came up with 140 visitors since February 1, 2008. That is, 140 different visitors! We were very careful not to count anyone more than once since many people are here frequently or have returned for repeat visits, but I'm sure we'll realize that we've missed some here and there.

Last night we were thrilled to watch our color guard team practice in the barn. They were scheduled to be here last week, but bad winter weather forced us to postpone. Eleven riders on eleven horses were in our facility all at once, performing simple maneuvers...what a treat! In addition to those 11 riders were 21 spectators watching from the sidelines. Our biggest concern was parking for trucks with trailers, but we had no trouble parking 9 cars and 6 trucks with trailers in our parking area. It was a great night!

Last week we hosted a horse health care clinic with our veterinarian for the Rough Riders 4H club. Ice and snow the day before had cancelled school functions and knocked out power for many in the community, so we weren't sure how many to expect for the clinic. We were pleasantly surprised with 35 visitors that night, and everyone enjoyed gleaning from Dr. Lance's knowledge.

We're happy to announce the addition of two students to next week's lesson schedule! God is so good! News of our mission is spreading quickly, and we're so excited to be a part of His great plan for these young lives.

Little Zoe and Our Students

Don't let this shy pose fool you! Little Zoe is growing more curious and ornery by the day! She can't resist poking her nose into everything just to sniff it out, and her playfulness is beginning to get her into trouble. As any little foal will do, she tried getting playful with Brian in the stall yesterday and just missed giving him a swift kick in the shin. He reciprocated with a foal-like kick of his own (not to hurt her, mind you, but to warn her in equine language that her actions were not acceptable). She was utterly shocked that he would do such a thing! It doesn't take long for these sweet little morsels to push their weight around and be dangerous, and just like with children, you must be diligent and gently mold them into exhibiting more desirable behaviors. She will soon understand when playfulness is appropriate and how aggressive she is allowed to be, but for a while she will try to see just exactly what she can get by with.

Our student list is growing rapidly, and we are so thankful for the opportunity to host them! We currently give nine one-hour lessons per week and have intermittent visitors as schedules and time permits. We will be hosting many new visitors next week. Various 4H groups are scheduled to hold meetings and clinics at our facility Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. We truly enjoy having kids here and look forward to the time we can spend with them.

If you haven't already, check out the changes we've made to our blog. We now have bios posted for the B5 Gang, and we hope to soon have photots and bios for each member of our equine family.

And then there were eight!

It's been a busy season for Jordan's Crossing at the B5 Barn! We are very proud to announce the birth of our youngest family member! At 6:09 p.m. on Tuesday, February 5th, while surrounded by an awe struck B5 gang, our 13 year old mare, Star, gave birth to a beautiful little filly. Within moments of her birth, the barn was bustling with visitors anxious to greet the eighth and most recent member of the B5 Boogietime barn family. Already living up to her name, Zoe (which, we have learned, is a Greek word meaning "Life"), is a lively, loving, inquisitive, and energetic little foal. She absolutely LOVES greeting our littlest visitors by poking her little pink nose into their faces as if to say "Hey, you're just my size!" (A photo of Zoe will be posted in the coming days.)

Speaking of our "littlest visitors," we now have 5 students who attend scheduled lessons on a weekly basis, not to mention the growing number of visitors who stop in periodically just to visit, pet, or groom the equine members of our family. Not surprisingly, our horses (even Zoe in her short 7 days of life) are willing to fulfill their duty by providing support to each and every child who visits. It is such a thrill to watch these children blossom in the presence of a horse. What a miracle to behold!

Of course, no new adventure is without its share of hurdles. First and foremost, 4H has begun and our calendar is bursting at the seams. Our girls don't do anything half-way. They are of the opinion that if you don't do it ALL, then it must not be worth doing AT all. That's why they've chosen to be in four different 4H clubs. Add ballet, tap, and tumbling class to that meeting load, and it's no wonder I'm on the road driving the wheels off my truck on a daily basis! During the really busy times, I feel a little sorry for myelf and long for a quiet night of "HOME." Then I kick myself and remember that "this too shall pass..." all too quickly! We must always look on the positive side. At least I have these moments of conversation while on the road with my gang! The second minor hurdle involves our most popular lesson horse, Dixie. She surprised us with a broken molar and had to have surgery at Purdue two weeks ago. She was immediately taken out of our lesson-horse line up, and we were a bit concerned that her favored riders wouldn't accept any other horse. We need not have worried. Dixie's momma, a 15 year old mare named Baby, gracefully stepped into her place and the students seemed content riding her for back up. In full confirmation of their contentment, I was blessed to overhear a conversation between one of those students and a friend of mine in our barn the other day. After being introduced to my friend, the young student told him that she used to ride Dixie, but now she rides Baby for her lessons. My friend responded by saying "I know Baby. She was born on my farm. She was my horse when she was little." The student looked up wide eyed and said, "Wow...you must really miss her!"

Well, I'm not sure how much Baby is missed at my friend's farm these days, but I am sure that Dixie was sorely missed around here while she was gone! One young student was so concerned about her that he called us following her surgery to check on her. Daily visits to her stall with pats of love by little hands and "oohs" and "ahs" over the "boo-boo" on her face have helped her heal. She can't yet be used in lessons, but everyone is sure glad to see her again fill that once-empty stall. No one was quite as excited as Dixie herself, though, on the day she returned home. As we led her through the barn that day, we laughed as she stopped and pranced at each stall, poking her nose between the bars and softly knickering hello to each of her equine family members. Upon entering her stall and taking a sniff around the place, she settled into her familiar living space with a sigh. I took a moment to join in her pleasure of peace and quiet with a sigh of my own. A few short minutes later I exited the barn with a smile and thought You're absolutely right, Dixie, there's no place like home!

Pay it Forward

Our Amish friends are gone. On one hand we were sad to see them leave, but on the other hand...well...it's quite nice to be getting back to some sense of "normal!" Word is getting out in the local horse community that we have a new barn. We hope everyone understands what it's truly about and that children and adults alike will come to use it.

This barn is not about a business venture; it's not about profit or gain; it's certainly not a selfish desire to have a place for our kids to ride year round; and quite frankly, our family didn't have a stock pile of money sitting around needing to be used. It's all about the Lord and His desire for us to serve others.

Lindsay, Emma and Lily have everything they could ever need or want (though they may differ with our opinion on that point!). They have knowledge of the Lord and His work in their lives, loving parents and grandparents, influential mentors and friends, and HORSES! They have guidance in the home and a 24-hour counselor in the barn! Very few children have all of these things...sadly, many children don't have even ONE of these things.

Which brings us to our point....

PAY IT FORWARD! That's what it's all about. We are here to serve others. Period.

Since the barn is practically done, we will soon have a meeting of the minds to lay out the final details of our services. This ministry is not "OURS," it is GOD'S, and He is obviously directing its workings through imperfect human beings (us!), therefore, we realize our services and plans will continually change.

We would appreciate ideas from our blog readers. If you have thoughts about our services, or big (or small) ideas that we can implement to make it fun and unique, please share by clicking on "comments" at the bottom of any of our posts.

Finally, an update!

A friend commented this morning that we needed to post an update on the blog, and we're very happy to finally be able to do so! Work has been slow until today. The crew didn't work last week, but they have been here every day this week and we are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel! TA-DAH!!!!

There is not much left to be done on the outside -- one more concrete pour, one sliding door and two overhead garage doors to be installed, and gravel in the parking area.

On the inside we need to complete the electric wiring, install doors on the stalls and in the hay loft, and complete the final touches in the tack room.

The view in the photo above is from the center of the riding arena facing the stall area. The stall area features a concrete aisle with a tack room in the center and three stalls on either side of the tack room. A four foot knee wall divides the stall and riding areas. Above the stalls is a large closed-in hay loft with access from either end of the aisle. The hay loft also features two outside sliding doors to aid in unloading hay from wagons directly to the loft.

We'll soon be making plans to add students to our roster...we are SO excited to offer this beautiful facility free of charge to the community, and we pray that the Lord will use it to reach little ones in need!

Progress is slower

It has been a while since we posted. Progress on the barn slowed tremendously last week and will be slow again this coming week. Bad weather and excessive mud slowed things down a little, and the Amish crew had to leave us for two days last week (barn raising) and will be gone for three days this week (weddings).

Most of the metal is now in place on the outside:

And Brian has done a lot of work on the inside:

Our next step is to begin the process for obtaining non-profit status. We understand that the process can sometimes get difficult, so we're hoping it goes smoothly. We would appreciate your prayers in this matter.

Our New Look...at home AND on the web!

If you've visited our blog before you'll notice we have a new look. Brian wasn't satisfied with the black background (he thought it was too difficult to read) and Sandy wasn't satisfied with the logo (it needed refining), so a bit of a transformation was in order.

As for our "little" (?!) construction project...it is getting a new look too:

Progress the past two days has been hindered by a couple of things - late delivery of materials yesterday and rain today - but when the rain finally decided to move out, the crew certainly got down to business! As you can see from the photo, we decided on two colors for the siding, clay and stone, and a white roof.

As for the RIDING portion of this adventure, the messy construction site did not deter our little trooper, Ellie, from attending her weekly riding lesson last night. Ellie has the distinct honor of being our first official student, and she is a horse lover for sure! She likes to muck stalls and groom horses almost as much as she likes to ride. She began riding with us in July, and she is just as excited about the new riding facility as we are. Two other students, Josiah and Aliyah, had to forego lessons through the winter due to scheduling conflicts, but we look forward to welcoming them again in the spring. We are certain the Lord has more students for us, and we look forward to greeting them in the new barn in a few weeks!